I was sitting at the KITCHen IsLand…
My thoughts were a million miles away when she came over with a gift for me. I was processing basically the last twenty plus years of life as I’ve known it. I was actually thinking about an older lady at church. Maybe you know the lady. She would tell me how fast time flies, and how quickly they would grow. It didn’t even seem relevant to me, as I cradled a newborn in my arms with three more kids on each side of me in the pew. But today, as I sat at the kitchen island, I realized it was relevant to her. She had likely graduated kids, said college goodbyes, packed up boxes for farewells, and even walked babies down the wedding aisle. I know now that it was her way of expressing the knowledge of fleeting years. Perhaps it was her way of letting me know she would love to be covered in babies and little people again, but those days had slipped away. I wish I would have asked questions. I wish I would have allowed her to tell a story about the time her children were little. I wish I would have seen her, because now I am her.
We recently had a nest full of eggs on our front porch in a large pot. We regularly checked in on the progress. We were met with the same view day after day of the mama bird, patiently sitting on her flock. She rarely left. I totally related to her. These days my once full nest is pretty empty. We have one little chick still here, and I find myself with time on my hands. Actually, I have more time than I know what to do with, which feels like a first. In full transparency, I’ve felt sad. I’m a glass overflowing gal, and it has caught me a bit off guard. My home is organized, laundry caught up, my photos are ordered and I’ve taken up watercoloring. What’s next? That is the question.
Back to the kitchen island, and my deep thoughts were interrupted as she tapped my arm. I felt something r0ll onto my hand. It was even my color palette, the perfect neutral and blush tones. I adjusted one of the upside-down letters, to reveal the word “MAMA” on a hand-beaded bracelet. This much-loved role looks differently these days, but I will still wear it proudly - just as I have warn the title all these years. I will remain in the game.
If you are reading this and you have little ones, just know that they really do grow up quickly. It might seem completely chaotic now, but this too shall pass. And when the older mama says something about how quickly time flies, just know she means well. Her heart might be grieving what once was.
I’m missing my chicks, but I’m thankful for what has been. I’m expectant as I step into the unknown. (Even though my heart hurts a little.) To God be the glory - great things He has done and will continue to do.